Beating the Game

I was talking to a friend about how complicated life can sometimes be. She said she was trying to learn to enjoy the happy moments along the way. We talked about how difficult it can be to find the line between happiness and responsibility. If we ever figure it out, I promise to share it with you guys. There are all these responsibilities when you become an adult though. It’s like I have a to-do list that never really ends. More stuff just gets added on whenever I start checking things off.

It’s hard though. I think the feeling of wanting to solve all your problems and fix everything is a pretty common one. I was thinking about all of this. Trying not to take life so seriously, just enjoying it but still being responsible… Then something popped into my head. A few weeks ago, my brother fell off the face of the earth. No one could get him to answer the calls or texts. My parents were getting really worried, but he had texted me 5 days before about the new Harry Potter game he had started. My brother works a lot, so not answering every call or text isn’t unusual. However, after another week, even I started to get worried.

Finally, my mom threatened to have the cops come to check on him if he didn’t respond to someone, and a few hours later, I got a text saying he beat that whole game. It’s not surprising that he would get that invested in a game; I just didn’t know he was that passionate of a Harry Potter fan.

It’s rare for my brother to totally beat a game because most of his favorite games are open-ended. Like, he can get to the highest level, but even then the game doesn’t really end; there are always more things to do. I was kind of disappointed though. Did he even have time to enjoy the game and get into it, or was he just rushing through levels to beat it? That’s like skipping through an episode you can’t be bothered to watch so you can get the gist and be done with it.

I realized though I treat life the same way my brother treated that game. I know what needs to be done. I want to do it all, get it over with, so I can “beat the game.” I realized that’s where the line is between letting yourself be happy and staying responsible. Beating the game is the end goal for everyone; that’s why we play, but we can’t forget it’s a game.

An example of what I think is a responsible balance is this: I play Hogwarts mystery, and there’s a main storyline you follow along with side quests, in-game activities, and magizoology. Sometimes during the side quests and stuff, I’m so focused on finishing them to get back to the main story that I don’t know what it was about. I skip through the dialogues so I can move on and finish them. I think that’s what it’s like when we focus too hard on our responsibilities.

On the other hand, other times, I’ll get so caught up taking care of creatures and earning more books to unlock more creatures that I forget there’s an actual story to complete. I can’t spend all my time playing mini-games or trying to unlock new creatures. I’m not making any real progress whatsoever.

My brother has played a game called RuneScape since middle school. He’s at the highest level and has unlocked all these fancy, rare things that only the most elite players can get. Apparently, they keep adding levels to the game. Once they add another one, he’ll do whatever you do in that game to get to the next level. In between, he just messes around in the game doing random stuff while he waits for a new level. Ideally, that’s how I want to live my life. Keep up with responsibilities so I can truly enjoy all the perks. Do I ever think I will get there? I don’t know.

There’s a sense of loss I’ve found though, when you beat a game. That’s why I don’t like to hurry through games. It’s not just because I’m bad at them. Some games are challenging too. We used to have Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets on our Xbox, and there was one part I never ended up beating. I just couldn’t do it no matter how many times I tried. My brother beat it on his file or whatever they called different user accounts.

After he completed that, he later got stuck on the level with the spiders. I beat it for him. He again struggled with defeating the basilisk, enlisted my help again, and I beat that one too. I helped him win the whole game but was always stuck on that one level. I don’t think I ever asked him to help me, or maybe he couldn’t do it again.

I think at times, we get stuck. Trying to overcome this mountain of responsibility, we feel frustrated and give up. That’s the time it’s most important to remind yourself it’s just a game or it’s just life. It doesn’t have to be serious. If you are stuck, give yourself a break for a day. Be kind to yourself and enjoy the little things life has to offer. Then try again.

You may still be stuck like I am right now, and that’s okay. My problems will still be there tomorrow. Physically at this moment, I cannot do the things I need to do. I’m already in bed while writing this, so changing my sheets clearly isn’t going to happen. Financially I will pay off what I can this paycheck, and once I’ve done all that I could possibly do at this moment, I’m going to try to just be happy.

Should I clean my room? Yes. I know that. Lately, I’ve been tired and stressed about how I look because even though I haven’t gained much weight, I can’t stand to look at anything but my face in the mirror. The mess will still be there when I’m ready to clean it, but until that happens, I will take it 24 hours at a time.

If I do nothing, I hope to genuinely enjoy and appreciate that time. In the mindset app, I hear or read (I’m not sure which) “you are worthy of rest,” and honestly, still just reading it feels wrong, but you know what? I’m gonna make that my mantra, and I’m going to keep telling myself that until the day I actually believe it.

Problems and responsibilities are much easier to deal with when we are in a good place mentally. This brings me to another thing I’ve heard multiple times from the mood check-in AI “prioritize your mental health and well-being,” “be gentle with yourself,” “focus on your progress,” and all these things that I’m honestly not used to hearing.

When I think of responsibilities, I think of work, bills, independence, and a clean living space. However, I think our most significant responsibility should be to ourselves. We are humans with feelings, and I will try to add myself to my to-do list. I’m not a machine. I shouldn’t feel bad when I’m too overwhelmed to deal with life. I can enjoy doing nothing without feeling so ridiculously guilty and ashamed.

I hope this brought you comfort if you are struggling. Thank you for reading, and let’s all do our best to ensure we are responsible for ourselves. Maybe you already are, but if you are like me and are bad at it, I encourage you to keep those quotes in the back of your mind. Don’t forget I’m always cheering for you, and I hope you have a good week.

Sincerely,
LIBD