Hey y’all! I hope you are doing well. I can’t believe it’s July and I haven’t fallen behind in my posting schedule. Darn, I bet I just jinxed myself, thanks a lot, guys!! It’s not like there’s a backspace button or anything where I could just delete what I wrote and not jinx myself…. In a perfect world. Anyway, enough chitter chatter, let’s dive right in. You all read the title, right? I don’t have to do a fancy introduction. Y’all know what you’re reading, and if you don’t; Well, the fun is in the mystery. Let’s do this!!
I should move 'cause New York is gettin' muddy out
There's L.A. but it's always kinda sunny out
I keep saying I’m going to move to Arizona, but I hate moving. Also, I’ve discovered I’m one of those people who’s just never satisfied. 70 and Sunny is my ideal day. 60-70 is my ideal temperature zone for me to not complain. But I don’t like it super sunny either so I’ve just accepted wherever I want to move to, I would still complain. That’s just the kind of person I am
And I don't wanna hurt no more
So I set my bar real low
This is my secret to life. I’ve said before when I went to see Cats the Musical, my bar was set so low that even an ant couldn’t crawl under it. Because of that, I think I enjoyed the movie more than anyone else on earth. It was not nearly as horrible as I was expecting. They took a musical with no plot and made it into a movie that kind of had a plot and only changed the songs a bit. I still think they butchered Mungojerry and Rumpletezer’s song, but that’s not why we are here today.
[Pre-Chorus]
I'm a-okay, I'm a-okay
You say it but you just don't mean it
You're so insane, you're so insane
Shut up and just enjoy this feelin'
I’m not okay in the way most people mean when they say that, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. I still have moments throughout the day that I enjoy. Right now I’m dealing with rotator cuff tendonitis which really sucks. I’d be more mad, but after 15 years I finally figured out what’s wrong with my arm so yay me!!!! I never say I’m good. I usually just say pretty good and sometimes I mean it, but feeling okay, like genuinely okay, is pretty fantastic.
[Chorus]
Don't you love it, don't you love it?
No, I ain't happy yet
But I'm way less sad
Don't you love it, don't you love it?
No, I ain't happy yet
But I'm way less sad
And you know what, I am WAY less sad than I used to be and I do love it. It’s quite refreshing. It feels good to wake up in the morning and not have any major catastrophes or crisis to deal with. Which is great since sometimes just dealing with my day can be a chore. You can’t always be happy though, so I have no problem settling with way less sad.
I wake up and I'm not so mad at Twitter now
The only way to not be mad at Twitter is to not be on Twitter, but maybe that was his strategy. Let me let you in on a secret… Twitter is stupid and pointless. If you want to stay in touch with someone, use Facebook. If you want a sense of community with random strangers, go join Reddit. The only thing people use Twitter for is to go pick fights with someone else whose life is so boring they also have nothing better to do than argue with rando’s online. I’m not so mad at Twitter anymore, but that doesn’t mean I hate it any less. Change my mind.
Livin' sucks but it's suckin' just a little now
And I don't wanna cry no more
So I set my bar real low
After 2 months of hell, I feel like anything would feel like a step up but I haven’t cried in like 2 weeks. How awesome is that? Please, hold your applause. You’re too kind, seriously stop clapping. I think I might start raising my bar just a bit. Maybe half an inch off the ground? That sounds like a good start, maybe in another week, I’ll raise it to a full inch who knows?
[Insert Pre-Chorus & Chorus]
I may wrong, I may be wrong
It's stupid but it's all I have
Maybe things aren’t actually great like I said in the last paragraph. When your life sucks that much for that long, anything is going to feel like a step up. I don’t care though. It’s stupid but it’s all I have. My counselor had to explain to me that I’m not having tiny manic episodes, I’m just actually happy and that’s a good thing. It feels good.
Don't you love it, don't you love it?
No, I ain't happy yet
But I'm way less sad
Quite frankly I’m not sure why he is asking. I don’t particularly care what you think of me or my feelings. If you are happy just be happy it doesn’t matter if anyone else loves it, I love it!!! Happiness still freaks me out a bit, but I can deal with way less sadness.
Well, I can't fall asleep and I'm losin' my mind
'Cause it's half-past three and my brain's on fire
I've been countin' sheep but the sheep all died
And I'm tryin' too hard but I can't not try
This is the problem with happiness. It always brings its side-kick excitement. I don’t need that when I’m trying to sleep!! How am I supposed to fall asleep if I’m all happy and looking forward to life? I hate how unnatural it feels. For example, I’m trying to fall asleep and it’s 11:30 and I have to work the next day, but all I can think about is how excited I am to open my Etsy shop. I was assured it’s not my bipolar disorder, but real genuine excitement which would be fine at like 3pm when my day starts dragging. Heaven forbid my feelings be convenient.
Well, I can't fall asleep and I'm losin' my mind
'Cause it's half-past three and my brain's on fire
I've been countin' sheep but the sheep all died
And I'm not dead yet, so I guess I'll be alright
That last line has gotten me through some of the worst days. When everything just seems so shitty I remember those words. It’s one thing to be told you’ll be alright, but it’s another thing entirely when I actually feel like I’m going to be alright. Sometimes those tiny little emotions feel more powerful than all the joy in the world.
[Insert Chorus]
I may be wrong, I may be wrong
It's stupid but it's all I have
Don't you love it, don't you love it?
No, I ain't happy yet
But I'm way less sad
I don’t think I’m wrong. Not right now at least. I’m not happy yet, but I know without a shadow of a doubt that I am way less sad.
Thank you so much for reading, I’ll post the song at the end. I got to see them perform this live along with a bunch of other amazing songs. It was sooooooooo much fun. Singing this song, and hearing it sung live. Not just because I like the songs, but because I truly believed the lyrics……. It’s hard to describe the sense of inner peace it gave me. I would love to see them again one day.
Don’t forget to like and leave a comment. Even if your comment is just that AJR is one of the best groups ever, you wouldn’t be wrong, so I’ll allow it. I hope you guys have a great week this week, and I will see you in 2 weeks with the intro to my new series ‘A Simple Plan for living life’. Get ready for even more music Mondays. I bet you’ll never guess which group it’s featuring…
Sincerely,
LIBD